My Yandere Harem Is a Nightmare
Life Goal: Attract a Harem
Life Path [Permanent Until Completion]
1. Multi-billionaire with Excessive Free Time
2. World Leader
3. Nobel Prize Winner of Choice Field
4. Ultimate Villain
5. Symbol of Peace
Kline looked at the list for a fraction of a second before choosing option 1: multi-billionaire with excessive free time. Why? Why the ** not? Thats why!
World leader? Buy politicians like everyone else!
Nobel Prize Winner? Hard work! Ever heard of Thomas Edison?
Ultimate villain? Money is the root of all evil!
Symbol of peace? Bomber jets are surprisingly cheap!
Enough money can buy anything. If it can , it can buy you advisers, helpers, and things that can.
Can you buy a womans true affection? Of course, you can!
Not with a blank credit card like an amateur. However, you can pay for a private investigator and a personal assistant to get her gifts that show how much you pay attention to her. Shell get a chinchilla, youll look like a charming billionaire, and your statistical chances of getting fellatio will skyrocket exponentially. Win.
If money and free time gave Batman superpowers, itd make any dream he had come true!
”Option one. Lets gooooooooo… wait, hold up! ” Kline cried in confusion, staring at the new screen that popped up with hungry eyes.
Primary Life Goal [Non-Permanent]
Every option on that screen was excellent. He imagined lives filled with happiness, fulfillment, excitement, fame, and respect. Each was a dream come true.
However! Harem. Ha~reem. Har-rem. Hareeeeeeeeem!
The amount of money he had spent unlocking Isekai novel chapters that year alone could bankrupt a high school teacher. So his mind was already balls-deep in unrealistic polygamy fantasies when he saw the option.
”I disgust myself. ” Kline sighed, choosing the harem option, ”I will make no excuses for my cultured ways… said every virgin ever. God, Im the worst. ”
Naturally, he went through the obligatory rounds, telling the world [I know, I know. Im the worst.], but his eyes and beating heart screamed [yall are just jealous, bitches!].
A third option window popped up.
Growth Rate [Non-permanent]
”To the moon! ” Kline chuckled, pressing one without giving it much thought.
However, when he saw the next screen, he immediately searched for the back button.
Fast Growth Enterprises [Non-permanent]
1. Social Media Influencer
2. Multilevel Ponzi Scheme
3. Crypto Scamming
5. Phishing Sites and Hacking Operations
”Where the ** is the back button!? ” He cried in a panic, ”I turned down the ultimate villain path! ”
[Lithco: Thats why you
e getting petty criminal options.]
Kline jumped for joy when he saw Lithco message him. ”Lithco, my dear friend! Can you please take me back— ”
[Lithco: Theres no back button. You should have thought about your future instead of proving you deserve bad luck.]
The blonde-haired teens eyebrow twitched. ”Why didn you mention this? ”
[Lithco: Why didn you think about your life before impulsively picking dopamine-grinding options? See, I can ask stupid questions too.]
Klines facial muscles tensed up reading the screen, and he admitted he was wrong. Silently. There was no way in hell hed read a [told you so] right after finishing his will.
”It says its non-permanent; what does that mean? ” He sighed.
[Lithco: Hoh hoh! It seems you do have the faculty to think. You have no idea how much money I just lost on that bet.]
The blonde-haired teen closed his eyes and took a deep breath. ”Please? ”
[Lithco: Wow, a please, too? You
e a jack-in-the-box of surprises today. I can turn down such desperation in good faith, so Ill answer your question.
To change your path, you need to choose an option and establish proficiency or a working enterprise before shutting it down and choosing another option.]
”So, in other words, Ill need to scam people until it makes me a multi-millionaire, and then I can change my path? ” Kline asked with the eyes of a dead fish.
After confirming the situation, the teen let his body crash back down into his hospital bed.
”I deserve this. ” Kline groaned, no longer caring about his image, ”That means… oh, ** me. ”
1. Social Media Influencer
His eyes glazed over, and he immediately encouraged his soul to leave his body and escape. ”Please kill me. ”
A new pop-up opened on his system window.
[Request: Abstracted Suicide.
Illegal Operation: Request Denied.]
Kline began cackling ominously, l
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