Starting Afresh

Suffering prolongs suffering.

~the diary of a frog~

Hello. My name is Alex, and Im 14 years old. I know its an odd way to introduce myself, but I can help it.

Ive never talked with anyone when I was young, and I never visited my relatives houses either, so I was always socially awkward.

I have 3 brothers and a sister. My youngest brother is just a baby, but my eldest brother is married and has kids, while my second brother is studying abroad. My sister is in high school right now and finishing her third year.

My mother is busy taking care of my sister and brother, so she has no time for me.

Its sometimes pretty lonely, but its okay most of the time.

I read lots of manhwa and watch lots of Chinese animations. I loved them so much I guess you could say I was obsessed. Even though I don know a word of Chinese, I want to learn it someday.

When I was 13, I met a person who shared my passion in manhwa. I was really surprised when he told me he also read those kinds of things.


Today, the classmate I wrote about before, brought a girl to class. He seemed really happy talking with her, but I don think he likes her.

When I told her to admit that she liked him, he said something, but I forgot what he said.

They looked really good together anyways. I hope they get together.


Today, that friend of mine was sentenced to jail for 4 years for killing his parents.

Everyone says he did it, but I don believe them. Hes too nice and caring. Theres no way he could even kill a fly.

When I saw him going to jail, I knew what I had to do.

Before, when anyone asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up, I said pilot or chef. But now, I know what I really want to be! A lawyer.

Im going to throw away all those people who framed him like that and make sure no one like them can be a lawyer.

Ill make it so everyone in the world can rest easily knowing their judges aren corrupt.


He is finally released today!

All these years, I worked really hard. Im going to go to Harvard law School after I graduate college, or atleast I hope so.

My mother doesn want me to study law because its too expensive, but I have to! I have to make sure no one else will end up like Joseph!

I had to take a student loan because my mother wouldn pay for my enrollment. But I knew the real reason was because my family wasn rich enough.

If only I worked harder and got a full scholarship… well, a half scholarship is good enough.


I saw the repeat of yesterdays news. Joseph was stabbed by the woman who lived in front of me.

My mother told me her husband abused her, so she went out to kill him, but she killed Joe.

I don know how she died, but she probably deserved it.

I can believe that lady would kill an innocent person like Joe!


Its been so long since Ive written in this diary.

Im just finishing the biggest test of the year. Im also about to graduate early.

The school even offered me a position as an intern at one of the biggest agencies, but I declined.

I still hadn forgotten about Joe.

Even though I promised myself to study and become a great lawyer for victims like Joe, the deeper and deeper I look into things, the more guilty Joe feels.

Even to me…

I probably shouldn doubt Joe, since hes the only one who accepts me how I am.

Even though it feels like hes done something really bad, he never judged me.

When we met, I was pretty stupid…

I could talk fine, but my grammar was awful. Worse than a 10 year olds.

I think it was because I read a lot of badly translated novels. And it might be because no one really taught me how to read or write.

Well, my sister wouldve been too busy with O-levels at the time, anyways.

~last page~

Dear Diary,

I can believe Im starting to write like this, but I guess I wanted to relieve some of the nostalgia from the first few pages of this diary.

I found out that Joseph was actually guilty. There was no other possible option.

He undoubtedly killed his family. He pleaded guilty.

But why? Why would he admit it? And why did he seem to be happy when he died?

Honestly, Im lost, but doesn matter.

For better or for worse, thanks to Joe, Im now among the greatest judges in history.

I guess Im even popular enough to write a few dozen best sellers, without even being a proper writer.

Even if Joe had nothing to do with it, Im sure its because of him Im here today, so Id like to say good bye.

To… my… diary..?

Gosh this feels so crazy. Why am I saying good bye to my diary?! Whatever. Lets just leave it.

~Alexander Ross signing off at 01/01/2058~

I can believe I had this 300p journal for over 35 years!


I closed the last page which was especially crowded at the bottom with me trying to get all the words in.

”now that I think about it, its Joes 34th deatha-versary. Ive never done anything for him after the first year, so Id better do something for him this year. ”

I sighed and walked over to the elevator in my office and punched the buttons into the elevator.

The usual 3 minute wait was turned into a 10 minute wait with the constant up and down motion with people pouring in and out.

If I knew it was a Sunday, Id have taken the VIP elevator and tried to hold in my vomit.

I don know whats worse. My fear of heights and that transparent elevator, or the 10 minute wait with the constant up and down motion with people standing at the sides of the elevator to avoid touching me.

When I got down to G1, my secretary, Tina, was there to greet me.

”Johnny Brookes brother sent you some flowers and a huge wad of cash. He wants you to give his brother a lesser sentence. ”

”throw it awa– shred the cash and throw it in Johnnys face, but give me the flowers. ”

”yes. ” she replied swiftly.

”and send someone to get me some incense sticks and cloth. ”

”… I know this is going over my boundaries, but who are you mourning for? ”

… should I say a friend who helped me get where I am, or my best friend?

”my best friend… and the person who helped me stand where I am now. ”

”… ”

Yeah, theres no way shed believe me.

Im sure she knows Ive never met anyone alone unless it was under work-based circumstances. I never did. Not in the twenty five years she was my secretary, and certainly not in the thirty years Ive been hopping in and out of law firms.

”his 34th anniversary. ”

”should I call the others to put together something special? ”

”yeah. Im sure hed like that. ”

Its nice how she can understand anything with just the most vague of hints.

I passed by Tina who was now on her phone.

She was probably calling someone to get the incense and cloth before I get out of the door.

Ah, one of the reasons I just love Tina. Too bad Im too old to get married to her. Otherwise, Im sure wed have been married by now.

I made my way over to the towering archway to go outside, and soon enough, I was met by one of the hundreds of support workers who handed me 3 incense sticks and some tissues and cloth.

I wasn planning on cleaning his grave too much, but it wouldn hurt to be a little more respectful, I guess.

I called over my chauffer and told him to drive me to Sylvan Cemetery.

I never liked limos since they were too long and inconvenient when compared to car brands, but I have to live up to my reputation.

The transparent elevator that seems to go up and down with no strings attached would be a perfect example of that. Pun unintended.

I told my chauffer to pick me up in half an hour.

Though I only visited him once, I remember his grave was somewhere around the far corners of the cemetery. It was in a corner hidden by overgrown willows and weeds.

I made my way over to the corner that smelled and looked the worst, but it was the wrong area, so I followed the prison-like fence till I reached another corner.

This corner on the other hand was much more terrifying. It looked like something right out of a horror game.

The house-like thing next to a few graves and dying willows made it much scarier than I wouldve liked.

I remember someone saying that house thing was the grave of a king who died a thousand years ago.

Well, I guess Joes grave must be around here somewhere, seeing as there are those willows over there.

Barbara Mustache, 2008-2022. Mustache?

Carlos Fatman, 2008-2022. Fat… man?

Wait, weren these two Joes friends!? Well, Carlos didn seem to like him, and he didn seem to like Barbara, but…

Ah! Here it is! Joseph… Stalin… why is he? nevermind. It must be someone with the same name. Just whatever you do, Alex. Do NOT look at the year. Okay Alex? No year.

*deep breaths*

Joseph Armadillo, 2008-2024.

Ah here it is. But why is his grave so clean?

I mean, it is still dirty, but not as dirty as the other graves in this place. It even looks tended to, but not very often.

”I don think he had many friends other than me and the people he knew in preschool? But I don think any of them live around here? ”

”gee. I must be crazy. Talking to myself. ”


”hey Joe, why did you seem happy when you died? ” I asked as if he were there.

”why did you kill them? Honestly, theres so much I want to ask you… but now I can … ”

”sorry Joe. I shouldve visited you before. ”

Now, I was just a moping mess bending down on his grave when suddenly, ZAP.

Well, it was closer to a low buzz than a ZAP.

I opened my eyes, not to see the ember-coloured sun set peeking through the openings throughout the leafless and dying willows, but instead, I saw a black sky.

The place I was in wasn something new to me. It was quite a familiar sight.

If a third party saw this, theyd think Im some magic person or whatever its called.

But this area Im in is actually not a place, but a sight.

Ten or so years ago, I was forced to take on a really difficult case. You know how in Chinese manhwa, the MC is always fighting someone really strong and influential?

Well, Joe said not many people will get it, but I think otherwise. Anyways, that person always makes things harder for the MC. Hed always make the MC fight super strong monster and stuff. Well, my situation was kind of like that.

I offended a big shot from the Fǎlǜ zhìxù zhī jiā. Its a Chinese law firm that has deep roots into American law.

Well, I was forced defend an alleged drug lord and prostitution manager. Prostitution, where I live in, is legal. But only on the streets and etc. Organized prostitution was made illegal in every way possible. The prostitutes couldn be charged, so my client had to take the fall for them as well.

When I started winning the case, my fame started to skyrocket. At the time, I was just your average lawyer. Maybe better than the average, but still.

One day, I was going home after miraculously leaving with my client and his three months in minimum security prison when we were attacked by someone. Unfortunately, my client died and my eyes were damaged.

Three or so years ago, I caught the man who assaulted us, but the damage to my eyes is irreversible. That is, if I want my already declining cognitive ability intact.

Im not sure if it was because I was jealous of people who had a higher cognitive ability or what, but the fading of my vision is becoming more and more common.

It became a really big issue when I had to go on national TV, blind. Luckily, only the assisting judges realized what happened.

They were able to whisper to me constantly about what was happening, and through years of hammering away at that poor piece wood, I was able to get though it.

Orange light started flooding my sight, just as I expected.

No..? The light is white? Im pretty sure it can be just yet?

Or could it be that Im dying? Or maybe even dead?

Wait… I still have so many regrets… not.

The only thing I regret is letting Joe die, and not marrying Tina. No, wouldn that be the only two things I regret?

But, there is one more thing I must try to say, no?

”week… ”

”sir? Are you feeling weak? ”

Tina? Oh, it must be Tina at my death bed…

”weekly uploads at midnight… ”



~in honor of my Chinese manhwa addict of a friend.

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